This week’s film gives us a fresh way to look at sex.
A sexual “jam” is for everyone. It’s a way of looking at sex and sexuality that makes room for different bodies and minds, as well as different desires, needs, and preferences.
Karen B.K. Chan proposes that we look at having sex as like going to a musical jam, or improvisation session. If you’ve never been to a music jam, they’re events where musicians, who may or may not know each other, get together to play music. A jam is usually focussed around a specific kind of music (Celtic or jazz, for example) but people there will usually have all diferent musical backgrounds and levels of experience.
B.K. Says: “The point of jamming is to find out what happens and enjoy the process of getting there.”
That’s also the main recipe for having enjoyable sex.
I personally think this video is brilliant
Even better, there are English and French subtitles to make this important work accessible to even more people.
Enjoy, and here are a few favourite quotes to get you started:
- “When we jam sexually, we’re not on opposite sides. Instead we’re collaborators.”
- “Musical jamming can only happen when everyone involved is into it; it can’t be forced – and it’s the same with sex.”
- “Pleasure is a renewable resource. Just like in music, pleasure is not better when it’s rare.”
- “Our partner’s yes {to sex} isn’t just a technicality.”
- “Imagine sex as a lifetime of jam sessions – some good, some not so good, all process, all plesurable, all collaborative.”