I published this interview with Joan Price on another blog more than three years ago. Since then, I’ve met Joan several times, and she’s just as funny and smart in person.
Joan’s approach to sex and sexuality is a perfect fit here at Ready, Sexy, Able.
Not all the changes seniors go through will be related to disability, and people with disabilities are all ages. But I think there are similarities in the kinds of discussions seniors and disabled people have about sexuality and relationships – conversations about how, yes, we really are intrested in and able to do sexy things, and no, our sexiness or our interest in sexuality really isn’t gross.
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Joan Price JoanPrice.com calls herself an “advocate for ageless sexuality”. She is the author of Naked
at Our Age: Talking Out Loud About Senior Sex (Seal Press, 2011), Better
Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk About Sex After Sixty (Seal Press, 2006), and several books about health and fitness, including The
Anytime, Anywhere Exercise Book: 300+ quick and easy exercises you can do whenever you want!! Joan also speaks professionally about senior sex and about fitness. Visit Joan’s award-winning blog about sex and aging at Naked At Our Age. Joan lives in Sebastopol, California, where she teaches contemporary line dancing – which she calls “the most fun you can have with both feet on the floor.”
How did Joan start writing and speaking about senior sex? For fifteen years, Joan was a widely published health and fitness writer. Then at 57, after decades of single life, she fell deeply in love with artist Robert Rice, who was then 64. Their love affair was profound, joyful, and extremely spicy. Their passion, in contrast to society’s view of older people as sexless, led Joan at age 61 to write Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex After Sixty (Seal Press, 2006) to celebrate the delights of older-life sexuality.
read more about Joan
You can also watch Joan talk about senior sex here!
A few months ago, I sat in on a phone interview with Joan,and found her one of the most personable, articulate, and delightful people I’ve ever virtually met. Her comppassionate but no-nonsense approach to sexuality is refreshing. Joan was kind enough to answer a few questions so I can share a little of her wisdom with you. Thank you Joan!
R.M. You’ve done a lot of things in your life, most of them relating to education in one way or another. I’m particularly interested in how your experience as a fitness professional and a sexuality educator interconnect. Do you think they do?
J.P. Yes, on many levels. bif we feel like we’re “in” our bodies, feeling the joy of movement and the way our muscles work, we enjoy both sex and exercise more. Physiologically, exercise increases blood flow not only to the muscles and the brain, but also to the genitals, enhancing arousal and sensation. Emotionally, the better we feel about our bodies, the more sensual and sexual we are able to be. And at our age, knowing we’re treating our bodies well will let us enjoy them more, overlooking wrinkles — I hope!
Also physical exercise is great foreplay! Robert and I always made time for walking or dancing as part of our foreplay. By the time we embraced in bed, we were already in sync with each other’s bodies and our own.
R.M. What are the three most important things you’d like seniors to know about their sexuality?
J.P. 1. Our youth-oriented society’s view of seniors who enjoy sex as icky, weird, pathetic, or ludicrous is wrong, wrong, wrong! Our sexuality can be pleasurable and joyful throughout our lives.
2. If something emotional or physical is interfering with your enjoyment of your sexuality, there are solutions available! That’s why I wrote Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex, because so many of us just accept our changes as inevitable, unchangeable, and too embarrassing to seek help for – and don’t know that solutions exist that can totally change our experience.
3. We as seniors need to talk out loud about our sexuality. That’s the way we can change both society’s view and enrich our own enjoyment by seeking information, learning what’s possible, and sharing that knowledge.
R.M. I notice that you use the terms “senior sex” and “ageless sexuality.” What would you particularly like younger people to know about sex and aging.
J.P. I know it’s part of youth to believe you’ll never be old, never be wrinkly or arthritic or have saggy skin, never fall out of love or lose a partner to cancer – but this all happens! The best “sex insurance” that a young person can have for a sexually gratifying older life is to learn about the changes, listen to elders about their experiences, and embrace older people who are willing to share with you. It’s a sign of deep maturity to welcome a dialogue with elders, and emotionally enriching, too.
R.M. …and if you could say a few words about what is coming up next for you, what your current projects are, that would be terrific!
J.P. Woo hoo! I’m very excited about my new project, editing an anthology of senior erotica! This will be a collection of stories and memoir essays by writers over fifty, featuring steamy characters over fifty. Think about it – why is erotica almost always about young, hot bodies? Is there an upper age limit to being sexy, wanting sex, caring about sex? I say no. Please see my Call for Submissions.
Update: Ageless Erotica was published in 2013. It’s available in paperback and e-book.
Further Reading
Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk About Sex After Sixty and Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud About Senior Sex are both availble in audio.
Joan’s latest book The Ultimate Guide to Sex After Fifty: How to Maintain ? or Regain ? a Spicy, Satisfying Sex Life is available in paperback, e-book, and audio